Well whether or not you know any of my deepest darkest secrets, it is highly likely you are aware of my love for the Tennessee Volunteers and my intense hatred for all things University of Florida.

Unparalleled loathing for every single Tebow-worshipping, jort wearing last one of them with all of my Orange and White soul.



 

In Tennessee, with the absence of a true instate rival, (sorry Vandy) it has oftentimes left UT fans at a loss.



Pure Old-Fashioned Hate.

Clemson and South Carolina.

The Iron Bowl.

The Egg Bowl.

Some Vols choose to hate Georgia. EVERYBODY hates Bama.

But there’s a special spot reserved in the hearts of TN fans for the Gators.

As the “Third Saturday in September” looms on the horizon, I want to remind myself and the rest of the Gator Hater Nation of a few things to keep the smack talking coming and the orange blood boiling.

I hate the Gators for the same reason that my mother’s generation hates the Alabama Crimson Tide:

Pain.

Long, bitter Sunday mornings and that smug look on Steve Spurrier’s face....

My senior year of college was 1998, the Tennessee national championship season. While this remembrance makes me smile, I am also very aware of the cringing embarrassments that came at the hands of the Gators both before and following that undefeated season. Peyton Manning never beat Florida. That hurts to say out loud. (Don’t try it. It’s not worth it.)

I hate the way ESPN and CBS (I’m looking at you, Lundquist) just fall all over themselves when fluffing Florida.

I hate the Gator nation’s lack of respect for any other program in the SEC.

I STILL HATE JABAR GAFFNEY!!!!!!! and Gatorade, that stuff just sucks.

What’s worthwhile in the city of Gainesville? Nothing.

Could you pay me to walk back into Ben Hill Griffin Stadium? Nope.

Does the “Gator Chomp” make me physically ill? Absofreakinlutely.

I wouldn’t root for the Gators if Jesus Christ himself was quarterbacking. (And if you ask some FL fans he did and now he’s a New York Jet). Sanchez isn’t going to let you on the field, Nancy. Sorry.

 

2006/2009 National Championship Conversation: “But Cam, you have to root for the SEC!!”

ME: “No, I don’t. I’m hoping for the stadium to implode.”

I want to run the score up 77-0 and pass into the endzone with 5 seconds left and then go for 2. I want to beat Florida in a game of tiddleywinks!! I want to see Tennessee win in Neyland and I want it done tomorrow.



Damn, I love college football.

GO VOLS!!!